How old was the baby when it took its first steps? That question is impossible to answer due to the fact the parents had an abortion and the fetus remained unborn.

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Why did the black man go to portugal? Because he was very hard working and needed a vacation.

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roses are red viloites are sour open your legs and give me an hour

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What do you call a one legged , one eyed, canadian fisherman called Samuel Browning? Mr Browning unless you are on friendly terms then Sam is fine.

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What did the little boy do when he got his test grade? Cried, it was 0

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Yo mama is so hairy! Then only language she speaks is Chinese

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Whats Worse then finding a worm in your apple. Finding a real joke on anti-joke.com

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What does NASCAR stand for? Non-athletic sport centered around rednecks.

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what do you do with a drunken sailor? take him back to port because he's not in a right state of mind to be on board a moving vessel

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Why the babie was not drinking his milk? He was dead.

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What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

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How did Richard the lion heart get his name? From his parents.

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Why was the black man hanging from the tree? He fell and had to grab a branch.

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

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what did the teacher say to the students when she was talking about the solar system The sun is very hot. At the core it is 15 million degrees Celsius or 27 million degrees Farenheit. Using a magnifying glass, we can see the very hot heat and the light of the sun. Please do not do that because it can hurt your eyes. This makes the light very bright and the heat is so hot it could start a fire.

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

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mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue Did you think I'd actually cry over you? I said I loved you You believed it was true Well guess what baby You just got played too! ??????

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A praying mantis is very graceful

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John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

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yo mama is so fat she has more rolls than basken robins does flavors

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A stand-up comedian quits his job. He has social anxiety and can't stand the pressure.

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Nero Octavios reporting, so far all of our sectors worldwide excluding Spain, Italy and Ground Zero are secure, Nero Augustus is severely wounded but will make it, and despite the our intel Necrissa Angelo is alive and well. We have one single worry though Nero7 the brunt force of the terror attack was large and powerful, yet resistance was incredibly light when we went for the counter-strike, too light, we might have to ready ourselves for some sort of reprisal here.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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