What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

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A sign at the drug rehab centre said keep off the grass. Jimmy thought it was a joke. So the groundskeeper chopped his legs off.

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Why shouldnt you take the virginity of a 14 year old? Their pre-frontal lobe is not developed enough to sufficiently judge the affect of this action on their life.

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Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

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How was the copper wire invented? 2 Jews pulling on the same penny!

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What happened to the homeless guy when a woman gave him five dollars? He shot the woman because he is mentally retarded.

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Why didnt sally throw out her lunch? Her mom had a miscarriage, she was never born.

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

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A lost young boy walks into a bar to ask for a map. The Bartender takes him into a room and rapes him.

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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You know what's funny about Fox news? Nothing. Lying to the public isn't funny at all.

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whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

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A man commands his dog to sit. However, his dog is poorly trained, so does not.

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Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

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why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black guy on a bike? Just because its not very nice.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

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why did the girl fall off the swing..? because she became unbalanced and the force of gravity extended on her was too great to prevent the fall

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Why didn't the jew spend his paycheck? He wanted to save money for the future

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Why did the elephant cross the road? To run away from the angry chicken who was mad that he was slacking off work.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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