a read head, a brunet, and a blonde sneak into a merchant ship. security hears some noises and goes on to investigate. all three girls jump into banana sacks. security guard kicks the first sack with the read head in it and she growls like a dog, so the security sees its a dog and keeps on walking. he then kicks the sack with the brunet in it, she goes on to hiss like a cat. so then the security guard kicks the last sack with the blonde in it, and she yells out "bananas!"...the end

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*Science Teacher goes into his class* Teacher:MR MCAAAAAAAN! What's the answer?! MrMccann: I dunno sir. Teacher: WHAT DO YA MEAN YA DUNNO?! HAVE I EVER ASKED YOU A QUESTION YOU DON'T KNOW THE ANSWER TO?! MrMcann: No Teacher:Then answer this. JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN DO YOU KNOW THE ANSWER?!

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I will create more jobs for americans

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Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

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How old are you? 7

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Why did Lindsay Lohan talk to her car? Because she's insane

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life is like a rapist. sometimes they're nice other times, they ram you in the ass.

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A Muslim on a plane yells out "Hijack!" Jack replies with "Hello" and the two engage in a casual conversation for the duration of the flight.

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You remind me of something What? Monday Why? Nobody likes you

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civil rights

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? Well, the difference is quite obvious. one's a car, the other's a dead baby.

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How do you drown a black? - pop their lips

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What if your name was Mr. David and the office called you down and you were wearing a dress?

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Roses are red Violets are victorious 2 in a chamber Mr pistorius

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Roses are red Olives are Black come to my and will smoke some crack

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A man walks into a bar. It was his push-up bar that he didn't install high enough. He bumps his head and it hurts.

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A kid is stuck in a fire, his dad (a firefighter) comes and saves him. Sadly the kid needed surgery from the fire. He went to the hospital and when the doctor looked at him he said "I cannot operate on my own son." How can this be? His parents are gay...

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what did one worm say to the other worm? nothing. worms are incapable of speaking.

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What do you call a Mexican in the sand? A churro! (not trying to be racist, I'm even Mexican)

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If you see a person falling down your balcony, Say cya later!

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

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why was the man denied his teaching job? because he is a wanted cerial killer in 43 states.

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? "Uh... So, you're a farmer?"

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George Lopez never said anything funny in his life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops