How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

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A black guy walks into a bar with a dog. He is asked to leave because his dog is not on a lead.

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Why was the black person sent to the back of the bus? All of the front and middle seats were taken.

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How did Bush really get into the White House? The front door.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face

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12 niqqa 12.

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batman farted so hes retarded

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Did you hear about the Australian man who was jumped by a gang of Americans with knifes? He had his cash and possessions stolen from him, and had to spend two weeks in hospital due to stab wounds.

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What would George Washington do if he was able to talk to all of America? Ask them to dig him up.

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What's blue and invisible ? Nothing.... Its impossible to be iinvisible and a color

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what did eric foreman get for christmas? a foot in his ass.

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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a black guy walks into a store and is caught stealing things the police are called they get there and hes calmly escorted to the police car

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What's worse than falling in the mud whilst wearing a suit? Burying your parents.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The guy didn't respond because he was deaf.

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yo momma so fat dora couldn't even explore her!!!

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

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roses are red, violets are fine, you be the six, and I'll be the nine.

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A pope meets another one

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What did the statue say to the other statue? stat-you?

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No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

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What did the follower of Neronism say to the follower of Christianity? Nothing, Neronism doesn't exist. -KyuremCult

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What does A.D.D stand for? Attention deficit disorder

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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