- Anti Joke

What do you get when Justin Bieber mates with a beaver? Nothing, the species are too genetically different to produce offspring

roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

Why was the man arrested? He assaulted and raped an elderly woman at the local Walmart. He then proceeded to hijack the poor woman's Scooter and lead police on a 4 mile long car chase.

Do you believe that if I theoretically am unmatched in many ways, would feel less alone if I decided to become more like the rest?

Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

why cant the porcupine marry the balloon? ...neither one can talk.. obviously.

Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

why did tiarnan not ride hi bike to school today? Tiarnans dead

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

What's worse than hitting your funny bone on a chair............... Hearing one person say "its friday" then realizing that you are now singing

Why did the young boy hit the other young boy? Because the other young boy was bullying his friend and he thought it was time he should stand up for himself and take control of the situation.

What noise did Helen Keller make when she fell out of the window? None. She wasn't aware that she was falling and died immediately upon impact. @rowakaflocka

Why was Timmy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face

Today we eat large amounts of pizza. The one piece had a lot of mushrooms. Like more than the other pieces. The cheese was flawless except for the burnt edges.

Why is it unpleasant to eat a meal with lots of basketball players? Because they will be focussing entirely on discussing tactics (especially if there is an upcoming game), and therefore will probably not be displaying good manners or making polite mealtime conversation.

Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why is Michael J. Fox so go at dance? Because he took lesson as a child

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

What did the black man say to the Jew? Hi.

roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It escaped.