Why does the cow eat grass? A: Because it's green. (Cows are colorblind)

Q: Why didn't Dwight D. Eisenhower play with the silly putty? A: Because he's dead.

knock knock, who's there me me who he opens the door a kills yo

Hey what did you do on The weekend??? I got hit by a bus!

what did the duck say to the monkey.............. QUACK!!!!!!!!

So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

Whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Jay-z

what can keep u alive for many years- -not being shot

A kid asks his mom: "Mom, what would I be when I grow up?" And so his mother answers: "You won't grow up, you have cancer"

What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

Whats funnier than watching the kid next to you on the computer? Nothing because he is still trying to figure out that i unplugged his mouse!

Why do birds fly South in the winter? Warmer, better food sources and therefore greater chance of survival.

what's the square root of pi? nothing. why would you add roots to pie, how gross.

Why was the black kid at school? Because he wanted to receive an education.

Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

Lol, first of all all I watched was something called Chobits many years ago, and while I know what hentai is, I cant say I watch that a lot or not really at all no... A peek but, its just too weird for me, they all look like cute kids with deformed bodies or something. What? You into Nerds now? Why cant I just wear my contacts and look somewhat less alien?

Roses are red Violets are blue Your grandpa's dead So are you.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse then says nothing because horses cannot talk, only humans can talk.

Whats worse than the holocaust? Sex with helen keller.

What did the african child get for christmas? Abducted.

Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

Why was little Timmy mauled by a bear? He poked it with a pointy stick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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