What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

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A blind man walk in to a bar... He then yells a 4 letter explative, backs up, and walks around it.

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Two elderly men were sat next to a children's playground... They were there to pick up their grandchildren because their parents were at work.

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What's the difference between celery and a truck?

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Why was Charles bleeding, because he was stabbed in the head with a needle

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A man walks into a clothing store, he calls his wife, buys a shirt, and leaves.

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Hey, I just met you And this is scabies So I'm prescribing you some permethrin.

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What did a husband do when he came home to find his wife murdering their children? Nothing. There is no excuse for domestic violence.

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went to mass. remembered to say with your spirit.

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why does clive keep getting crunk? because no girl satisfies him as much as geros

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What is white, black, and red all over? A: A zebra being slaughtered.

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What was the last thing that went through the crashing helicopter pilot's head? The propeller.

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What's the difference between your momma and a bucket of shit? Well, for starters your mother and a bucket of shit aren't even made of the same physical structure, and secondly, your mother is sentient while a bucket is not.

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Dennis: you can make anything out of coppersulfate Austin: But copper sulfate can make things out of you

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Why did the rooster cross the road? To go play with the other roosters.

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what did one worm say to the other worm? nothing. worms are incapable of speaking.

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When the poop hits the fan and you walk in with your pants around your ankles, it's a bad sign!

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If you were a booger, I'd pick you and then wash my hands directly after because boogers are gross

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Today, both my parents were killed in a car accient. FML.

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What did the person say to the other person? "Hello."

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God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

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roses are blue violetrs are green im shooting heroine into my head

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What's the best thing about Windows OS? It's very versatile and can run a wide selection of programs, tools, and games.

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Why did the boy chuck a fridge at the other boy? Because he broke his toy train.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops