What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

a dyslexic man walked his god.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call an Aboriginal in a yellow sleeping bag? An organised man, ready for the harsh winter ahead.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was 6 afraid of seven? well if 7 8 9 then what happened to the rest?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did Johnathan drop his popsicle? He was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Johnathan

thumb_up thumb_down +1

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

The Holocaust is worse than any number of bee stings. Unless, of course, bees separated people of certain ethnic backgrounds from their families and killed them off bit by bit by stinging them.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why do catholic priests enjoy the company of boys? Because they must remain celibate and cannot have children of their own.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is more difficult than trying to get blood from a stone? Trying to teach it Japanese in the process. [L]

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How many asian children does it take for Gary Glitter to get aroused? Just one.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A car with three black people in it is driven off a cliff and everyone dies. Why is this a tragedy? Because it is always a tragedy when human life is lost.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A family walks into a talent agency. Talen agent says "Okay, what's your act called?" Dad replies "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do a purple cow and a red fire engine have in common? Both like eating pizza on Fridays, except for the red fire engine.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Salt is brown, Pepper is white, my kitchen is in a mess.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: What did the chicken cross the road? A: "Why did the chicken cross the road?" is a common riddle or joke in several languages. The answer or punchline is: "To get to the other side." The riddle is an example of anti-humor, in that the curious setup of the joke leads the listener to expect a traditional punchline, but they are instead given a simple statement of fact. "Why did the chicken cross the road?" has become largely iconic as an exemplary generic joke to which most people know the answer, and has been repeated and changed numerous times.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Stop driving smart cars you fags

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How did the mouse die It was eaten by a cat How did the cat die It jumped into the bathtub and drowned

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why is the baby on fire? Because there was a gas leak at the day care facility. It would have been a terrible tragedy had a heroic babysitter not come to the rescue.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than having to listen a song from Justin Bieber? Being wrongfully convicted of child molestation,rape and murder and spending 50 years in prison before being acquited by DNA-analysis.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops