what's the worst part about owning a prius? telling your parents you're gay

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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So a bar walks into a man...

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why should not women able to vote? because their stupid and should not vote at all

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How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb none, because chickens do not have opposable thumbs,therefore prevents them from preforming such a remedial task.

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says "It's probably not a good idea that your in here, any sudden movements and you could seriously injure somebody. Our beer glasses aren't ergonomically designed for your kind of species. I'm going to have to ask you to leave"

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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Dennis: you can make anything out of coppersulfate Austin: But copper sulfate can make things out of you

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because he was content where he was.

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A duck walked up to a lemonade stand. The owner of the stand marveled at how close such an adorable duck was to him and proceeded to sell lemonade undisturbed.

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What do you get when a man farts then a giraffe digests the gas and then poops into the mouth of a rabid baby raccoon? A raisin coated in corn flakes with digestive fluid sauce.

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Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

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knock knock. who's there? 9/11

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

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What's white, wet, and loved by women? A polar bear cub.

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why did the monkey fall out of a tree?? a snail threw a refridgerator at him

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Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

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Everything makes me look good, Rape doesn't look good on anyone, and it hurts everyone involved

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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you can either take the test now or on monday. (hand movement)

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I am back with more jokes! -Lets go Mets It is best to dislike this one

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Sometimes i like to stand on my chair and pretend that i am a carrot.

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Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops