what do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? run

I'd rather kill myself than commit suicide.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse then says nothing because horses cannot talk, only humans can talk.

Why does Tim Teblow love men? Logan Cole told him to.

How do you know if a woman is cheating on you? If you catch her cheating on you

Is the glass half full or half empty? The liquid in the glass is not at exact half, so that question is not answerable.

mommy mommy! why are we pushing the car over the cliff?! the mom answers shhh youll wake your father...

What did the white man say to the black man? Did you see the game yesterday?

What did the man say to his wife. Hi

Knock Knock. Who's there? Scott Scott who? Scott Henderson. Oh my god Scotty! I haven't seen you since highschool, please come in.

Three men walk into a bar. Something happens not at relating to them.

How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just two, the mystery is how mice can get inside a lightbulb.

Where do you go when you find a fork in the road? To the nearest restaurant.

What happened to the old lady with a hat? She fell down

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Your mom is so fat that she has to wear larger clothes than the average person.

Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? No, we can't.

My daughter's so smart, that instead of texting K, she writes Potassium.

Knock knock. Who's there? IRS. Youre being audited, Sir.

knock knock "whos there ?" "the police , your husband has died" "ok"

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

If I was in a room with Osama bin laden and george bush, and my friend. And I had a gun with two bullets, I'd shoot my friend twice.

A Jew walks into a bar........... he buys it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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