what's red and has seven feet? the red man who had seven feet as a result of a serious genetic mutation

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Jamie Oliver eats a chip

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Well Here Goes Nothing And nothing happened

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What do you call a human with no eye? A Human.

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Q: What was the proctologist doing on the street? A: He was observing the assfault.

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Your mom is so fat that her every day life if a struggle and she has to get gastric bypass surgery or else she is going to die

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What's up? Up Adverb: Toward the sky or a higher position. Preposition: From a lower to a higher point on (something); upward along: "I climbed up a flight of steps". Adjective: Directed or moving toward a higher place or position: "the up escalator". Noun: A period of good fortune. Verb: Do something abruptly or boldly: "she upped and left him". Synonyms: adverb. upward - upwards - aloft - above - upstairs - overhead preposition. on - upon - over - along - with adjective. rising noun. ascent - rise - upgrade verb. raise - enhance - increase - lift - rise

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what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

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Q: Why couldn't the skeleton go to the party A: He had a boner

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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A professor of literature asked me, "Young Sir, why are you burning those books?" I replied, "Because I need a fire to cremate the bones of your 3 sisters that I violently raped and murdered" He smirked in a witty and arrogant fashion, until raising his head and saying, "Bond, James Bond" He continued to massage his dick with his own pubic hairs before collapsing and dying

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Whats black and white and red all over? A chopped up dalmation...

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What happens if you accidentally say your best-male friend's name instead of your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, they're both named Adam.

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Why did the nun cry? 12 babies were killed under her care.

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How many dogs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. Dogs don't have thumbs.

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How do you know when your pizza is ready? When the oven timer goes off, indicating that it is done.

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Why should you never attempt to rob Chuck Norris? Because he will beat you up as he knows self defense.

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What is green and slow Grass.

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what do you call a chicken thats little? a chicken. I lied about the little part

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How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

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What has two legs but can't walk A paraplegic

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Why can't John hear what Muhammad says? John is deaf.

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Whats a six letter name for black people? Friend.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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