Whats red and smells like Bacon. Bacon

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What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

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What do you call a green blur in the sky? Super pickle?

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An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

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I think everybody should have a penis.

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What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

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your mommas so fat she should be worried about getting diabetes

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Why did the boy live on the street? He was an orphan.

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What did Tim's grandma get him for his birthday? Nothing, because Tim's grandma died in a car accident 2 years ago

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Two guys walk into a bar together. They are diagnosed with a concussion and later on in life have serious brain issues

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In order to find a woman, you need time and money. Woman=Time&Money The longer you spend at work, the more money you get. Time=Money Money is the root of most problems in the world today. Money=Problems Therefore Women=Problems

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They say time heals all wounds, yet my leg still had to be amputated.

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Why did the puppy get shot? It lived in Detroit.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

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Brother : you see this hand Sister : yes Brother : if you dont leave ill slap you with it Sister : no you wont !SLAP!!!!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

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Knock knock *I need to either stop masturbating or answer the door* He's probably masturbating. *Who's there?* The other guy left. The end.

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Why was Jimmy sad he couldn't play the Playstation? He didnt have one

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You know what they say about priests with big rosaries? I don't know, it's in Latin.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting stabbed.

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Why did the weiner dog that punctured Doris' bladder get carried away during an oral sex session? Because the dog had a terribly troubled childhood which led to a faliure to adequately function in adulthood

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Why did the man read the terms of service? He had ignored them before, and was forced into a scam where a shady organization took all of his money and possessions. With no other way to provide for his family, the man began selling drugs, which led to several arrests. He has been n prison for 3 years now... His wife has left him for one of the man's close friends

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What is 6 1/2 inches when erected? My penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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