Red are roses Blue are violets Dyslexic am I.

How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

Whats happening when you see your TV floating at night? You are probably suffering from some sort of mental disorder which causes spontaneous hallucinations and should seek medical help before the condition worsens.

How do you piss off a redneck? You wait until he is done fucking his sister and then you steal his truck.

On a tusday night, three guys walk into a bar After realising they have to work they proceed to exit

How did the Mexican got into the USA? Trough the border.

whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican has elbows.

Why do black guys have ashy elbows? Because of 9/11

Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death

One day a baby hit himself on the head with a stuffed animal. I lied, it was a brick, so he died.

what will hit the ground first an apple or Obama The apple, obama was stopped by a rope

What's worse than getting a papercut? Literally anything.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

What is not a car park? Clash of clans

What is long, hard, and full of seamen A submarine you pervert

How do you know if a woman is cheating on you? If you catch her cheating on you

Did you see Stevie wonders house? Neither did he.

A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

What wuld u do for a klondike bar? Nothing taste like shit.

You know what's funny about Fox news? Nothing. Lying to the public isn't funny at all.

A man walks into a bar. He hasn't been there before, and it's a Friday so it's really crowded, and it's really quite a dive, so he and his girlfriend decide to leave and find somewhere else to eat.

How many Russians can you fit in a Mini Cooper? It depends on how big they are.

What is the name of the mermaid on the Starbucks logo? No one knows, she ran away many years ago of shame. It's undiscovered why.

How can you tell if a woman is stupid? Yell the word "STUPID'' and see if she turns around.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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