If a train leaves Chicago at 50 miles per hour, how hard does the baby strapped to the tracks get splattered?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

roses are red violets are violet hey look up there! Its a suicide pilot!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

If you can fit many clowns in a car and many mexicans in a car...how many mexican clowns will fit?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was the man worried? because he had a shotgun up his ass

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why did the kid fall off his bike he had a serious illness which made it difficult for him to play sports

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q. Why did the lotion soothe the person's skin? A. Because its ingredients were selected because of their propensity to soothe skin.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: Why did Timmy cry? A: You would too if you had your arm cut off

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the duck cross the road? Because he was tired of the publicity his friend, the chicken was getting for crossing the road that he wanted to do it himself. Halfway across the duck was wistfully hit by a car and sadly, his story is lesser known and 99% of the people in this world really don't care about him. Thumbs up if you're that 1% that shows sympathy toward the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is the difference between a jew and girl scouts. Girl scouts come back from camp

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is the best way to deal with a broken ankle? Ear Lobes.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did one dead baby say to the other dead baby? Nothing, they are both dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the White man scream when he saw a Black man? Because he was scared.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Screwing in a lightbulb is a simple, menial task, and the fact that the man was a Jew is irrelevant.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are red Violets are red I have Ebola

thumb_up thumb_down -5

So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the woman go in a elevator with Ray Rice? Because they were both going to the 25th floor and stairs would take too long.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the black man eat KFC? Because he got hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

wnna here a joke, toby limbers playing basketball

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the director call cut? Because he was shot dead by Nazis.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops