How do you punish Hellen Keller Move the furniture around

There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

Jimmy Saville

yo mama's so fat, yo mama's so ugly; your mothers breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks

Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

have you seen stevie wonder's harmonica? neither has he.

THAT AWKWARD MOMENT... nuff said

Wanna hear a hot headed retard? call and listen carefully 6196342668

Why did I get thumbs down from everyone? Answer: Because they hate my anti-joke.

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer what did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that long.

Person 1 - Did you know there is only evidents of killer whales killing in captivity Person 2 - tell that to my uncle Pete... He's deaf

You're so vein you are probably a tube that conveys blood from various parts of the body to the heart.

What do you call a rich black person? A: Oprah

What mouse walks on two legs? Mickey Mouse. What bear walks on two legs? Winnie the Pooh. What duck walks on two legs? All of them, dumbass.

Why did the tomato blush? It didn't, tomatoes are naturally red by colour.

You're mom is so slutty, she has sex with many men.

How many dead rats can you put in your ex-girlfriend's bed? 437.

What's the difference between a blonde and a microwave? If you don't know the difference you need a psychiatrist.

I woke up in bed with someone this morning. I forget why this is a joke, but your mother is a whore.

What is 1 + 1 equal to? 2, because if you have one orange and if you add another orange, you will have 2 oranges, therefore 1 plus 1 is 2.

What is white but you can't see it? A bottle of milk around the corner.

What's worse than being short? Being a Tutsi in 1994.

Chuck Norris has normal human strength.

Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat low calorie foods because she wants to lose weight.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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