Yo momma so stupid she threw a rock at the ground And missed.

Two strawberries are sitting in a bathtub. One says to the other, "Can you pass the soap?" The other one says, "What do I look like, a typewriter?!"

There were two mufins in an oven. They did not say anything because muffins are incapable of speech.

what did the whale say when he came out of the water? BLAHHRRAHAHHAAARRRAER

What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile? "Robin, get in the batmobile!"

why did the chicken cross the road? he was an escaped mental paitent

What do you call the birth of George Lucas? Terrible, abdominal pain for his mother.

A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

Whats big and blue and white and if it falls from a tree its sure to kill you. A fridge with a denim jacket on.

Q.How many dinosaur species can jump as high as a house? A.All of them, houses can't jump

Why did the girl drop her cookie? She had no arms.

When an anvil and a feather are dropped off a building the anvil will hit the ground first because it's heavy

Whats included in over 90% of all car crashes? A Car

whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

What did the little boy say when he was asked what he wanted to be when he grew up? Adolf Hitler

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Me Me, who? -You -You? but I thought you were me. - I am you, you're looking in the mirror, asshole. - No, sir i'm sorry you have the wrong house. Asshole doesn't live here.

What did the lawyer name his daughter? Nothing. The lawyer is sterile and can never have children.

What is black and burns really well? charcoal.

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

What's long and black The unemployment line

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says: "I forgot to store nuts for winter, now i am dead."

There were a dog and a cat in a family house. The dog turned to the cat and said .. nothing because a dog can not speech the human language.

Why did the woman eat her sandwich. She was hungry.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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