How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

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What's the difference between a portuguese widow and a llama? One is a portuguese widow and the other isn't.

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i am 26 why was i kidnapped 13 years ago cause i was in a badly written play

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Chuck Norris once stared in a show called Walker: Texas Ranger.

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What do you give a homeless person? Poop in a bottle.

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Q: Hey, ask me if I'm a tree. ".. Are you a tree?" A: No.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Why did the black man have a gun in his hand? He was crossing through a dangerous neighborhood and was offering protection to himself and his family.

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What is better than tissues? Correct!

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Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? Billy was a loaf of bread.

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two muffins are in a oven the one muffin says jee its hot in here and the other muffin says wow a talking muffin

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Why was the black man hanging from the tree? He fell and had to grab a branch.

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Why did I get thumbs up from everyone? Answer: Because they like my anti-joke.

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what happens if you fart to hard? A.you shit yourself

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Knock knock Fuck off!

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why did the black man start crying? because his ancestors were treated horribly

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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whats black and white and black and white and black and white? a penguin rolling down a hill whats black and white and laughing? the penguin that pushed him

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Roses are red violets are blue... Only not really. Actually light is reflected off them and these colors show up soo....

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This is a shovels and rakes conversation. No hoes allowed.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree? No

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Want to know how the dyslexic man with no left arm and no left leg? All left

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I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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