In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Why was the pizza mad? Because he was going thorough a growth spurt and the testosterone got to him.

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A man wakes up after only one hour of sleep due to his insomnia. He starts to cry because his wife just passed away and his parents were recently killed in a car accident. The man gathers his composure, takes a shower, and drives to his minimum wage job. He was expelled from high school for an assault he didnt even commit and has no money to get an education. At work, he accidentally drops a box of valuable, fragile electronic parts and gets fired by his boss. He goes home to his dirty 1 bedroom apartment and contemplates suicide. He decides to wait as his favorite tv show is on. He turns on the tv to the news his show has been cancelled. The man, depressed, suicidal and alone, picks up his .22 and kills himself. There is no God.

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A man drove up to a drive-thru. He ordered a coke, but the lady at the window spilled it on his lap. He promptly changed his clothes and accepted the lady's apology.

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Your mamas so fat, she was self-conscious about her weight and became an antisocial vegetable.

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What do a tree and I have in common? We would both be mad if we got turned into paper.

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So, there's a black man, an Asian man and an Irishman who are in a bar, politely discussing wether the Asian's phone would break if it was thrown from a plane in the Pacific Ocean. The black man says "Of course it would break." The Irishman says "I have no opinion on this..." The Asian man says "I think it would break, you are right John." Suddenly, a man enters.

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What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

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What's the difference between communism and race mixing? Zey come for our blood, but drown in zeir ovn!!!!!

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Jack and Jill went up the hill. But it was winter and they froze to death

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how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his family!

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What's another word for Manslaughter? My new Hobby

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What does mickee say to other animals. Mouse

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Ask me if I want an orange. Do you want an orange? No.

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Why did bethany fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Bethany

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Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

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I recently sent 10 puns to a joke website, hoping that one of them would win a competition. Unfortunately, they were deemed offensive.

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roses are red, violets are blue, if ruddell was black, he would smell of poo.

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Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

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whats the difference between a black man playing basketball and a white man playing basketball? They are different races

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Person 1: I need an adult.... Person 2: I am an adult. Person 1: I need another adult... Person 2: My friend's an adult too. Person 1: I need a third adult Person 2: GOD UR NEEDY!

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Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

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Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

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Whats big black and hairy? A large black dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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