There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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On September 11th 2001, A worker of North twin tower man woke up to find his dog had chewed on his brand new phone. He went down stairs and realized his kitchen window had been broken. Getting ready to leave for work and saw his radio had been stolen out of his car. After finally making it to work and settling down in his office he spilled coffee on his lap. Enraged, the man yelled, "How could today get any worse!?"

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A farmer and his son were walking to the well to fetch some water. The farmer stops, turns to his son and is mauled to death by a lion because they were in Africa.

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Dennis: you can make anything out of coppersulfate Austin: But copper sulfate can make things out of you

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A priest and a rabbi walks into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says "is this some kind of joke?".

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Why did the pot-head have red eyes? He got soap in them.

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What did the douche bag get for Christmas?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I was raped when i was little.

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LISTEN UP PEEPS, I'M GOING TO SHOW YOU MY PASSWORD.. just as shown on screen THIS IS IT: ******* YEP just as shown on screen

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what's the worst way to fall asleep? sad. it makes you lose sleep.

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If it's mid-july and there are flying cows everywhere, how many bacons does it take to impregnate a spaghetti ? 3, because because vases can't swim in the dark.

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? It depends on a variety of factors such as the size of your mouth, the amount of saliva, etc.

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What is worse than finding a dead bug in your coffee? September 11, 2001

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They scolded her and sent her to her room.

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What is red and smells like blue paint? Read paint.

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What do you call Justin Bieber's assassin? A hero doing a noble favor to the community.

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If you are riding on a boat and all the wheels fall off, how many pancakes would it take to make a dog house? It does not matter because fish don't like tomatoes.

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how do you get a cat out of a tree? shoot it

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Ask me if I'm a rock. Are you a rock? No.

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Roses are gray, violets are gray. I am a dog.

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Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

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what starts with f and ends with c k....???? FIRETRUCK

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How do you make a clown stop laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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What did the man do when he ran out of milk? He went to the store to get some more milk!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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