what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

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Thanks, I admire your sincerity, and I am happy to see that I got a lot more in common with you, than with well, my nerdy and geeky friends, which are not reading this here and now unless they are going against their orders and messing up their own work schedule. I just want you to know that I have fallen in love with you Nero, and if that is a problem for you, please let me know ASAP.

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How do you make a kids parents mad? Fly an SR71-BLACKBIRD into him.

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Why do mexicans like tacos? Because tacos are a very well liked food and they happen to taste good

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A man is going to sign up for life insurance, he is stabbed by a mugger on the way and spends his last breath in a puddle hating the cruel irony of his fate.

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Skinny people fart less.

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A kid goes into the ocean on a boogyboard and then gets eaten by a shark because the shark thought he was a seal.

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Why did Jimmy fall off of his bike? Well, he was always known for his lack of balance.

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The Juice where prosecuted by many time.

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What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

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what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

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Why did the mexican buy 50 tacos? Because he was taking them to the orphanage where he grew up. Isn't that nice?

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Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

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What did the boy with no parents get for Christmas from his Grampa? Nothing because his Grampa had alzheimer's disease -Flap

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What's worst then leaving a public toilet when you just took a shit and the toilet is now clogged Realising that the maid was waiting for you to get out to clean the toilet...

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Why was Nathan upset Because his sister died from an undiagnosed case of tuberculosis

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Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like Satan.

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Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

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A man and a woman meet on a roof, fall in love and get married. The ceremony was rubbish but the reception was brilliant

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bob said "Hi Joe why the long face" Joe replies "I'm a horse dip sh*t"

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How do you get your dog to give you a blow job? You have to force him.

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What was the fly doing in the soup? Nothing, the guy ordered pizza.

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This girl came up to me and said she recognized me from the vegetarian club. Her name was Jill.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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