Why wasn't the white guy voted for president? He had down syndrome

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Hey there, I like bananas! No you don't.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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A man and a Rabbit are in a bar , the Rabbit looks at the man and says, none of this is real.

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You walk into a shopping centre, what wont you see? Madelin McCann.

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Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

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What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Sara

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Q: What's white and sticky? A: Glue.

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I stabbed a person. No seriously, I just stabbed them. There's no punchline. Just Just Stab wounds.

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what happens if you drop a spoon? it sounds a lot, and it's annoying

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Why do I have a Virtual Boy?

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Whats 1+1? window!

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Two Holocausts.

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What's green and has wheels? Nope, it's a car.

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What's worse than a tree getting cut down? This joke.

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What did the hose say to the sprinkler? I'm gonna squirt you.

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What do Kurt Cobain and a whale have in common? Both have holes in the back of their heads

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What did the players of the all black NBA team say to the white rookie? "Congratulations for making it to the NBA! Your hard work and dedication has certainly paid off."

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What's big, white, and kills niiggers? Hurricane sandy

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What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Nothing, she didn't make it that far

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If I was trapped in a closet with you and a bear, and I only had two bullets, I would shoot you twice!

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Theres a girl you like, and a you are playing football with friends. You see the girl about to get hit by the ball, but you catch it. She says "Your a life-saver" and hugs you "You scream touchdown!!!" to impress her, you spike the ball on the ground and it hits her in the face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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