roses are red violents are blue your dad is gay soon it all be you !

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the boat sink I shot a missile at it

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How does a Welshman take a shit? Like anyone other human being does.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Day turn night. Dreaming is now true . Turn on your flashlight, slenderman is behind you.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why do They call a horse a horse? Because They speak English.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the chicken have a sore neck? Because the farmer cut the chicken's head off, and the body ran around for three minutes until it finally bled to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

how do you keep a monkey from stealing your banana? shoot it

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Don't you hate it when someone starts a sentence and doesnt fi...

thumb_up thumb_down +12

i had sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the chicken say when it finally crossed the road? - nothing, its a chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's long hard and full of seamen? A boat, or possibly a submarine.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man named Hank, from Idaho takes a trip to Michigan. When he arrives, he rents a house and starts a meth lab. Hank is spending 7 years in jail. Hank was charged with stealing.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

An englishman, a german and a ginger are in a band. they play some creative music that some people may find enjoyable to listen to and would like to purchase a track.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What could be happier than a fat guy eating 20 pies? The guy he bought it from!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

jack and jill went up a hill so jack could lick jills candy but jack got a shock and a mouth full of C O C K cause jill's real name was randy... ... and joe diragi liked it

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are red, my name is Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's better than doing the Hannah Montana's hoedown-throwdown? Throwin' that ho down.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's worse than one cat stuck in a tree? Getting raped

thumb_up thumb_down +12

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: What's worse than ten babies tied to ten trees? A: One baby tied to ten trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why was Cathy sad. Her husband Drew was killed by a land mine on a peace keeping mission to Iraq.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why couldn't Timmy ride his bike? He didn't have a bike, his family was very poor and did have much money. Therefore a bike for Timmy was the last of their concerns.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops