Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who is there? Not Suzie

What did the man say when he lost his car? Where the fuck did my car go

what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A- a tv

In Soviet Russia, blonde is smart

What's long and black The unemployment line

Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh..wait...that's actually an anti-joke already...

What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

whats worse than being out in the cold? Being on the sun.

What do you say when your hot chocolate is to hot? This hot chocolate is too hot.

Why aren't fish good at telling jokes? Their neural structure isn't capable of processing languages or creating a method of communicating with humans, thus they both do not know any jokes since they are incapable of understanding the concept of humour.

Whats worse than one dead Baby in ten trash cans Getting raped by kobe

How do you get 100 Jews into a Volkswagon? You don't. It's impossible to fit that many people into a car that small.

Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

Q: Why did Jesus die for our sins? A: He didn't.

It's raining, its pouring, the old man is snoring. He bumps his head, and is quickly rushed to the ER for serious head trauma

one man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. when he was drinking the beer he choked and died

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Skeletons can't move.

Why did Suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

Why 't the blonde dial 911? Because phones haven't had dials on them for at least 40 years or so. She can however punch it in on her keypad.

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

2 bald men are standing on an oval, one turns to the other and says "leukemia."

Knock knock, Who's there? Justin Bieber, LEAVE!

Q.If I have four apples and billy has 4 oranges, how many pancakes will fit on the roof. A. 3 because aliens like purple hats.

How does a boy with no arms or legs cross the street? He doesn't

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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