What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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womans having rights.

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Why didn't John get a present for Christmas? Because John died eight months ago.

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Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Your mom is so fat that she has trouble walking up the stairs because she gets easily winded.

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Knock knock Who's there Orange Orange who Orange

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whats the difference between an orange and a dead baby? one is a tasty treat and the other is an orange

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor.

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a guy walkied into a bar... he really got hurt

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swings? She had no arms... Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs... Why didn't anyone help her up? She had no friends... Why did she die? She landed in a puddle...

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What do you call someone who puts one number on here as a joke? Someone with no life.

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Seriosly. too much sex again?

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what starts with b and ends with b? The bomb i just planted in your house.

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what did one gay guy say to the other gay guy? want to suck dicks? (cause that's what gays do)

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what does dana do in her free time? make love with jarrett

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Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

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Why did the serial killer need the knife? He needed to butter his bread

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Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

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Yo' Mommas so poor, She has to ask close family friends and relatives for money so she can feed you.

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Where is aodhan's ma? Jail, she was cought with a bag full of the white powder.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

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no

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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