Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Henry threw it well.

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whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a muslim cleric walk into a bar. In Syria. Dead children.

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What's worse than a papercut? why do you insist on asking me these questions?

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Yo mammas so fat she wears big clothes!

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Gastapo

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i found the cure to cancer.......AIDS

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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What would you do if I ripped your face off? Bleed to death.

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One day a kid said to his mom: "Mom, I painted the bed sheets with your lipstick". So his mom got mad.

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One day a black guy bought some fried chicken. The clerk said: Lol you guys always eat chicken! Lol said the black guy, yeah I am here a lot. Clerk: No I meant your kind of you know... I KNOW WHAT? Clerk: You guys at the studio next door! Oh, yeah, lol I almost thought you meant my skin color! Clerk: You fucking Negroes always thinking we are racist...

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What did Marshawn Lynch say? Yeah

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What's long, hard, and in my pants? The SAT's... I lied about it being in my pants.

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What did Timmothy get when he got back from his vacation in a tropical destination? Malaria.

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What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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Best reaction to Anti-humor joke me: whats green and has wheels Friend: idk Me: Grass i lied about the wheels Friend:wow dick

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I workout, Don't mess with me.

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Why didn't jimmy get to eat his ice cream? Because he got hit by a bus

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Who moved faster? The snail or the blind man? The blind man until he ran into the road and got hit by a bus.

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How many fairies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two, but I don't know how they got in there.

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Why did the man give money to the Jew? Why would a man give money to a Jew?

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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A man entered ten puns into a pun contest, hoping that one of them would win. Unfortunately, he came in third place and was discouraged by his loss.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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