A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? because he was hit by the planes that hit twin towers

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your friend is gay, but you are not. nothing happens

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What's the difference between an American and a British guy? Their fingerprints.

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Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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What's black and runs fast? Newsflash: Most of you are racist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? If you don't know the answer by now, there's something wrong with you.

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A duck walks into a grocery store. He looks at the shopkeeper, who then grabs a broom and shoos him back outdoors.

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A black, white, Asian, and Mexican are walking down the street. This is showing a good diverse community.

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What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

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What do you get when you cross a Mexican and an African? A baby.

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Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

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Why are black people like trees? Because they fall down if you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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Why did the chicken die? Because it was crossing a busy road.

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A gay guy asks a boy out and a girl The girl said no but the guy said yes And the two gay guys went to dinner And made out

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I saw a black dude eating fried chicken a white guy said he wanted some but the black guy said don't put your white mayonnaise on my fried delicious KFC fried chicken

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What more orange that a lime? Most things.

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What was the little boys least favorite part of Christmas? Getting raped by his uncle.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "GESTAPO! AUFMACHEN!!!"

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How would a camel lick its own tongue It doesn't It actually gets karate chopped by Bob Sager.

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Why did the hamster cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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YO MAMA'S SO , A STUPID, THAT SHE PUT 2 QUARTERS IN HER EARS AND THOUGHT THAT SHE WAS LISTENING TO FIFTY-CENT!!!

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Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first polar bear says, "Pass the soap." The second polar bear replies, "No soap, radio." OMG YOU DON'T GET IT?!?!?!?! NOOB

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops