How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

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What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Awwww sheeeeeeet!

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: To get to your house. A: Knock-knock B: Whose there? A: The chicken!

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T-rex: If you're happy and you know it clap your hands, oh...

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What is better than tissues? Correct!

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What did ahmet say to adem...? LEMME SUCK ON THOSE TITS joke made by dark

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Why was the boy dead? The boy was hit by a bus ran over by a train and stabbed to death by a murderer then put into a grinder for a meal for the murderer.

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(Knocks on Helen Keller's door) You: Knock knock Helen:....

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Chuck Norris once stared in a show called Walker: Texas Ranger.

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What do you call a man with no arms and half an eye? Larry -Jack Sparrow

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What did the douche bag get for Christmas?

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Why aren't dragons real? Because if any animal were to breath fire (let alone have a gland that produced it), they would cease to live for their necks would scorch from the inside out.

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There is no "i" in "team," but there are two in "indigo."

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What do you give a homeless person? Poop in a bottle.

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LISTEN UP PEEPS, I'M GOING TO SHOW YOU MY PASSWORD.. just as shown on screen THIS IS IT: ******* YEP just as shown on screen

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Why did Gina laugh? Because something was funny.

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Oracle horacle, you big bloated boracle!

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whats brown and has wings? a stick, i lied about the wings bit

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what do you call lots of jews on a train? Call them what you want they aren't coming back!

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I saw a number three walking past me in the street the other day and I thought to my self that's odd.

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What do you get if you put 2 Korea, 2 Europeans and 2 North Americans together? TSM

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What's blue and smells? A dead girl guide.

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What should you do when you're constipated? Poop.

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YOUR MUM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops