What's wore then finding a worm in your apple? Being the only person to survive a plane crash over Alaska, then having to eat your family in order to stay alive waiting for help to come.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.

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Yo mamma is so dumb, she bought a Wii and was satisfied with her purchase

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What's straight and famous. Ryan Secrest I was just kidding about the stright

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Q: What is white, and comes out of a woman? A: No, milk you perve

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What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

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there's a worm in my lime at least it doesn't have scurvy

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Why did the black man go to the back of the bus? The only unoccupied seats were back there.

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What stops a train? A missile

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know I'm not a bird physcologist

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

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What do you call a fat ginger kid? Whatever his name is.

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My daughter got a kinder surprise with cool toy today..... i killed her i didnt even want the toy

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Have you seen stevie wonders house? neither has he.

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Q.How do you kill a Zombie? A. You can't Zombies are fictional monsters that do not exist in our reality. instead why not focus on killing other things such as, Terrorists, Ants and People who piss you off

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Why does Amy leave Dan? Dan gets hit by a bus.

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Try this on some random person on the street... You: "Excuse me sir, do you know how to get to Farnsworth Street?" Man: "Sorry, no" You: "OK, you go straight ahead, then turn left on the second street. Continue about 200 feet, then......"

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Why did Timmy mow the lawn? He didn't particularly like the way it looked Why did Timmy fall down the well? He is retarded and thirsty How did Timmy die? He had stage three lung cancer Why cant Timmy drive a car? He has been dead for three years

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**** *** *** ****** *** ** *** ***? ***** I bet you wish you could read that joke. It was **** hilarious.

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What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

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How do you stop the London riots? - You employ a a highly effective police tactic to diffuse the crisis as quickly as possible.

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Roses are red Violets are blue this doesn't rhyme i like trains.

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Stalin and Hitler went to Kmart to buy mini-toothpaste. Because they schleifen schlafanned on their way to the country club.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops