What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

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What do you call a smelly black person? An African american with poor hygiene

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How do u turn on a lamp? Flip the switch

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What do you call a person who hammers a nail into his forehead? A dumbass.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Mormens...

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What did the tree say to the plant. Nothing tree's cant talk.

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What is black and blue and doesn't like sex? The 6 year old in my basement.

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Whats the difference between a monkey and a baby? Eating a baby tastes better with saltines.

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Why did the kid lose his mom? She was shot.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Q: Why did the little girl fall from the swing? A: Because she didn't have arms. Q2: And why did she fall from the swing again? A2: Because she tried to get on it again.

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Who does creatine? James Cornish

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Why did the chicken cross the road?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: "There goes my income. I dont know how I'll support my family now, or keep my crops alive."

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Mom says my name I reply Coming.

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Why did the whale cross the road? He was being chased by the Japanese.

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Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

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why didn't the baby cry once it came out of the womb? because it was a stillborn.

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what do you get when you cross a broken arm and a broken leg? .... a broken head.

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No, I had no idea, nor did I know that Nero means Black or Darkness until I searched it up some weeks ago. No, I would never photoshop anything, I mean sure I am the girl/woman thing with the big tits, but that`s like all I got going... Oh and yeah I use glasses sometimes because these contact lenses become itchy after a while and stuff.

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Just friends, they too pretend to be you and copy the way you write and express yourself, I told them to stop though, Azure threatened someone here a cultist of sorts I think, that does not exactly put us in a better light with the people that where getting our messages, and yes they are coded, I sincerely had no idea though,

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ROSE ARE BROWN VIOLETS ARE BROWN WHO SH*IT IN MY GARDEN!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops