hi jonny

What word starts with "f" and ends with "uck"? Firetruck!

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I f**ked your mom last night. Will you marry me?

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

Q: Why did Tom bought a new sweeper? A : because his grandma fired their maid

What did the man say to his friend when he beat him in a game of billiards? Good Game.

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

Q: A man walked into a bar and said, "Ouch!" Why? A: The man walked into a METAL bar.

How did freedom die in Europe? It was shot in the chest with a rifle.

Whats the difference between a muslim and a christian? They believe in different things.

Statistically, 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape

Voldemort's nose is so flat, that it looks like he doesn't have a nose.

Who's Micheal Jackson?

Roses are red, My name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van

what did I say to myself nothing because its very weird to talk to your self

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Love and attention from his parents.

If a red house has red bricks, and a yellow house has yellow bricks, what colour of bricks does a greenhouse have? Greenhouses are made of glass.

Your momma is so hot your dad married her. She then slept around with other men. Your dad found out and now they're divorced.

Humpty the extreme sized grenade fell off the wall. The universe is now in little pathetic bits.

Forward this anti-joke to at least 15 people And absolutely nothing extraordinary will happen in the next 10 minutes.

Why did the bakery run out of the business? They weren't making enough dough

What did the gay man say to the other gay man? I like guys... cause I'm gay.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Beacause the destination he was trying to reach was across this road Notice how he tried This is because he got hit by a car but know one cares for him

What did the white man say to the black bartender? I'll have a pint please.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...