What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

Little Johnny walked into class one day. The teacher announced their would be a pop-quiz on the declaration of independence. Johnny passed. (ic3)

what is orange and sounds like a parrot a carrot

Your momma is so dumb she'd starve if she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store. -Actually my mom has a pHD in Nutritional Science. If she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store, she'd utilize that knowledge to maintain a balanced diet until a way was made available for her to return home.

I told my grandmother to act her age.... she then died

How did the black guy get knocked out? He was hit by a fridge.

How do you make a frog stand still? Shoot it.

Why did the car catch fire? It was parked in Ferguson, MO

What's worse than stepping in tar? Getting your face ripped off by a man sized Tarantula

Why did Jimmy pass out Cause he drank a full tallboy

Two carnivorous dinosaurs get into a fight. Carnage ensues and many baby dinosaur eggs are stomped on, and in the end they both die.

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

why was the boy crying over his dog, his cat, and his bird? Cuz i raped them Wat about his pet hamster? I threw it at a wall

How do you make a great cake? Bett Crocker books

laughter is the best medicine, unless you have cancer, then you will die.

why can't timmy tie his shoes? Because timmy's an earth-worm

What's big and black? An ant i lied about in being big

My mother has great posture. She's paralyzed from the neck down.

What happened when Susie fell off the Ferris Wheel? There was an open seat.

They say time heals all wounds, yet my leg still had to be amputated.

why does pink turn into blue it doesnt you just get hit by a frigde because you cried whe you got shot several times

Q: What's the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage. But I don't have a pile of dead babies either. So, yeah.

whats worse than getting lost in europe? becoming the middle in the human centipede.

What do the snake and the bird have in common? They can both fly, except for the snake...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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