whats red and bad for your teeth? a brick

What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

Human: Are you a frayed knot? Frayed knot: I'm afraid so.

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Why does Joel get so many numbers from girls? Because he asks for them nicely.

how man

What do you call a black man that flies a plane? A pilot you racist bastard!

How many victims of the holocaust does it take to screw in a light bulb? Zero. They're all dead you sick fuck.

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

What do you get if you put a baby in a blender? An Erection

What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

How many men does it take to change a lightbulb? One

Q: Why do black people hate country music? A: Because every time they hear "hoe down" they think someone has shot their sister.

Why did the homosexual man buy the antijoke book he enjoys reading

What did the man with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike

What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

Your father must be an alien because he's driving a UFO

why shouldn't you get a clown angry? Because they'll yell at you.

Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

Knock knock Who's there? Owl Owl who? Owl Johnson, your neighbor. Oh hi Owl, please come in.

whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

How did the little boy die? A speeding moving truck took a sharp turn, the locks on the doors broke open and a huge office desk flew out and crushed the boy.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Who job is it to protect the forest? Obiously a male and/or female forest ranger of smokey the bear. It's that simple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...