What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot n' spicy and the other analyzes urine. -Emo Phillips

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I found a lump on my right testicle. So, as a precaution I went to my local hospital to have myself checked out. Thankfully, it wasn't accute testicular cancer. Instead I only had to suffer for a few months, but it's getting better now. Sadly, I won't be able to have children and now my semen has a somewhat unsavoury flavour. Thanks for asking.

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Communism hehe xd

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an ethopian thanksgiving

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Sometimes I finger myself to some Madonna and Mary J. Blige shit. - Jesse

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what looks like a sock and goes on peoples feet? A sock

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I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, cause they are walls.

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What do you call a lord of the rings poster with nothing on it? A piece of paper

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What do you call a woman when you're inside her? Mom.

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One says "Holy cow it's hot in here!" The other one says "Wow, I'm a muffin and I can TALK!"

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what's bloody and sweet? A squashed mosquito sprinkled with sugar.

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theres a straight guy, a gay guy ,and a jew the weird part is the straight guy hits on the jew and the gay guy which make the situation all akward.

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When life gives you AIDS! Make lemonAIDS!

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Q: A Mexican and a Jew are at a race. Who get hit first? A: None of them because they're from a different religion.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a loaf of bread.

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

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Jack wasn't nimble. Jack wasn't quick. Jack sat on the candle and burned his corduroys.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he needed to go home.

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How do you make a firefighter happy? Give him a blowjob and 10 million dollars.

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Ok so a black guy is packing his bags for college and then......... wait a minute?

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There was an english man, and irishman and an pakistani sitting in a bar. What a wonderful example of racial & cultural differences bing put to one side while they are socialising in a friendly environment.

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Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

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Joe:Hi Steve how was your day? Steve:Fine why do you ask? Joe:Because I am gay. Steve:Well if you are so happy tell your sister.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops