What do you call a man with only one eye? Half blind.

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Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

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Hitler wasn't such a bad guy. He did kill Hitler.

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One Direction has 12 letters. So does gayyyyyyyyyy. Coincidence? I think not.

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Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. There is a frog in his beer.

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why did the crops die? because a deranged clown sprayed them with liquid nitrogen.

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

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What was so incredible about this bigger new oven i just bought? It could fit twice as many Jews in it. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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What's the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? What's the WNBA?

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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Knock, knock. Now before I asked "Who's there" I first opened the door as then I can see who's there without having to ask them through the door.

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Rick Ross is so fat, that he is fatter than someone who isn't as fat as he is.

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For every person with a broken heart, there is another person out there with a stapler <3 And that person really needs to staple their math papers together so they can turn them in.

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What time is it Mr.Wolf? About half 5. Alright, thanks mate. How's the kids? Managing. Yeah. Yeah. Crazy world. Anyway, Got to be going. Yeah yeah. Say hi to the wife for me. Will do. Alright, Bye. See you later.

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a brick cheats on another brick the brick finds out and dose nothing because it is a brick

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What's long and black The unemployment line

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What do you do if a goose comes flying towards you? Duck.

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Why did the smoker die at a petrol station? He had lung cancer.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i know where you live now I'm coming for you

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Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

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How many Obamas does it take to screw an economy? What do you think?

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What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

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What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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