Your mother is so fat that I would call her quite fat indeed.

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Did you hear about the constipated mathematician who broke his calculator? He went to the shops and bought some laxatives and a new calculator.

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What do a cow girl and an orange have in common? They all are fruit, except for the cowgirl.

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Yo momma so fat that she was diagnosed with obesity and may need medical assistance in the future and will be reliant on you, her child.

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Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

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knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

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When is a door not a door? When it is thrown away. Then, it will likely decompose in a landfill or be recycled into another product. In either case, it will no longer be a door.

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How many elbows does a Jew have? 2

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Why couldn't the dinosaur sing? Because dinosaurs are extinct

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- Wanna see a magic trick? - Sure - Too bad. I don't know any.

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Q. A couple went on a boat. The boat sank. Every single person died, who survied? A. The couple.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Her frustrated farmer lured her with bread crums in hopes of retrieving his beloved chicken.

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Two blondes walk into a building......you'd think at least one of them would have seen it.

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Why is my phone bill so low this month? Because you have no friends.

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Why couldn't Johnny drive? He doesn't have arms or legs. Why didn't Johnny have arms or legs? Johnny is a potato

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What do you get when you cross bread an eagle, a wolf and shark together? I don't know, but I'm pretty sure it will kill all of us!

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THe Election

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why was the white girl not wanting to have a baby with her boyfriend he was black

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Why does Chuck Norris own a can named Chuck Norris? because he is self-centered due to all the attention payed to him for virtually no reason at all.

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How did the 8 year old child die? He was raped at the age of 7 and given the STD of AIDS. His clock then started as his family weaped his final days of his life.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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A man walks into a bar He says "ow" and promptly sits down and ices the bruise he sustained

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What's long, hard and full of semen? An erect penis prior to ejaculation.

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Why couldn't the bartender sell alcoholic beverages? He got fired

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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