How do you get a black man out of a tree? Tell him he won the current game of hide n seek.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It probably saw an animal that it wanted to chase, or a person carrying food, or another dog that it wanted to make friends with.

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why did the mans alarm clock go off at six am? he has a high paid job he doesnt want to let down.

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drugs sex and alchohole are yumme as AIDS

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Bang Bang Get the hell out of the house, it's on fire.

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Billy wanted a toy for Christmas. Sadly, Billy died before Christmas.

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OMG FUCKING NERDS WITH NO LIFE CAN READ ABOUT THE POWER OF YOUR Vaginal puss puss color, no but seriously, I kinda prefer unshaven, I mean if I change my opinion I just do it myself or command that you shave yourself while I put it on my cellphone while I jack off to you, making a creampie, yeah because.

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What did the black guy do with his gun? Shoot a deer

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What did the little boy want to be when he grew up? A cone

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Why did the blond girl walk into the street pole? Because she wasn't paying attention.

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run farther?

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so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

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Yo Mama so ugly I don't know how she found your dad.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: he was sucidal because his kids hate him and his wife cheated on him.

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Is the glass half full or half empty? The liquid in the glass is not at exact half, so that question is not answerable.

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What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

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Q. Wheres your nan???? A. In my closet

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Why did the small 12 year old run away which a chicken. He felt like it and he was carrying bread which the chicken was allergic to.

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One day there was 2 black guys in hoodys with knives in there hand. They tapped me on the shoulder and took my groceries. They then made me a jam sandwich and went on there way

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I do not want to know, you want to TELL ME so that I can increase the potency of the hypnotic suggestion by... Lets say... A number that if I said would work instantly? I wrote CONDOMS ARE FOR PUZZIES... Which kinda makes sense... Just a line, from the worst game ever.

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What did the pear tree say to the farmer? Go harvest that corn over yonder.

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What do you call a German who roasts Jews for a living? A comedian.

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Why was the man with one leg good at balancing on one foot? He used crutches.

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yo mama so dumb... because she was not properly educated

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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