What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

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What did the chicken do? He crossed the road.

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Once there was a pig named Poga. When he grew up, he was slaughtered and made into bacon.

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Bob: Do you know the difference between beer and women? John: No Bob: Oh

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Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius!

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Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a car and died

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A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

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Why did the stoner cross the road? He didn't. He was stoned

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the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

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Why did the... Timmy, your mother and I are both tired.

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Get Outta Here We're Closed!

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

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Bill went into a store and bought a bagel. However, after eating it, he realizes he meant to buy a doughnut. He tells the cashier that he meant to order a doughnut, and asks for his money back. The cashier says no and the man leaves.

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What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

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Sorry babe, even if I was I would not tell you, the entire place is surrounded, but within enough of a distance, so we will plant a nice setup around the green shack so everyone assumes his deal was some solo operation, if someone else is heading at his direction now, you are gonna get busted, so you better stay down.

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5 black men walk into a 7-11 at midnight. They clog the all of the toilets in the mens bathroom causing them to over run.

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What did the Scientist say after he created Frankenstein? - I just created Frankenstein.

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A car with four Mexicans drives off of a cliff. What's the bad news? They were my friends.

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What happens if you drop a baby of a cliff It dies

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Charles missed the stop sign. Charles can't read.

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Why do black people like Black Friday? They can get fairly expensive appliances for a very reasonable price.

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have to go to the bathroom now...

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Two guys walk into A bar. The third one ducks.

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Q: What did the air freshener say to the car??? A: Nothing. Air fresheners are inanimate objects

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops