How many babies does it take to paint a house? That is child labor, which is illegal in many countries.

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why aren't doughnuts square? because they are round

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

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How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

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How many juice does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Let's go play on our bikes.

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Q: whats the difference between a t.v and a dead baby? A: i don't have a t.v in my garage

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Why did the blonde fail her science test? Because she spent all day at the hair salon getting her hair died from brown to blonde when she should have spent the time productively studying.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dont really care anymore BECAUSE I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CLICHE!

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what did the african man have for breakfast? Ebola cereal.

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Whats green and smells like a red apple? A green apple

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Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a bus and didn't know! The funeral was touching and sad. Everyone cried. 2 weeks later..........Johnson ended his own life.......

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Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

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A Duck walks into a bar.

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I have alzheimers and one day me and my nephew were............................

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What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

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A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

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If life gives you lemonade.

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Cornflakes were an accident, so was Chernobyl

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What did the bank teller say to Santa Claus? May I help you?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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