what did the farmer say when he lost his red tractor?

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

So, a man walks into a bar. His alcoholic habits are slowly tearing apart his marriage.

Roses are der Violets are eulb I am dyslexic

Q: How Do you make a baby be quiet? A: slowly chop it's head off with a blunted axe once it's head is off eat it

What's worst then a road kill? Multiple road kils.

What did the autistic man say to the woman? I have autism

What's your star sign? Cancer. Oh you're gonna die. AWKWARD.

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away Because no dog likes being called "hurrrrdhjkdhjsaklhdkhjkddssaduyiwqkhdbewcjk"

What did the blonde say when she fell out of a tree? Nothing, she shattered her trachea upon landing.

That Rachael chick needs to get back in the kitchen

Where is boots, Dora asks Why the hell are you asking me when your the one who is with him.

How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them

What do you call a dragon with no wings? a dragon with no wings :(

Mary had a little lamb... The doctor fainted

What do you call a Muslim on the moon? An astronaut

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was attempting to get back to his farm.

Chuck norris doesn't make his own butter he roundhouse kicks the cow and the butter comes straight out.

What’s spotty, has three legs and is green all over? …well?

Why did the woman make the man a sandwich? Because the man severed his spinal cord and is no longer able to move any of his limbs.

A man wakes up in his bed and looks at the clock. He realises he is gonna be late for work. He quickly gets out of bed, into the bathroom, has a shower, puts his deodorant on and brushes his teeth, gets dressed, and goes in his car. He drives out of his garage and drives to his work but gets stuck in traffic. He then gets to the car park of his work and parks his car. He gets out, goes up the elevator to his floor, when the elevator door opens to his floor, he quickly says hello to Terrance and goes to his bosses office. And guess what the boss says? You're late.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?' The horse say " i have testicular cancer."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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