Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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Q:your jetski loses a wheel. how many pancakes does it take to fix your house? A:blue berry icecream.

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What did the alchoholic get for his birthday? Nothing. His alchohol abuse split up is family and now he is alone.

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Yo mama so fat, that she's even bigger than the universe!

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A: What do you call a deer with no eyes? A: I got NoEyeDeer!!!

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There are two blonds in a car, the driver to looks to the other blond (carelessly taking in her surroundings) They crash and the passenger is grusomely killed to the point of not being recognized and the driver later commits suicide from the guilt and pending law suit.

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What's sad about four children going over a cliff in a car ? Four children just went over a cliff in a car.

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why was the black man running away from the convenient store? He was going for a jog and it just so happened that he passed by the store

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What did the dog say to his owner? Bark.

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Yep, super duper stressed, all of the time, but how did you know?

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Call me for a good time! 402-805-2412, I do anal!;) -Martini Wyant

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Pandas Everywhere!!!

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How are this and that alike? They aren't.

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Two muffins were in an oven. The first muffin says: 'It sure is hot in here!' The second muffin says: 'Why are they only cooking two muffins?'

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I took my father out last night. We went to the Olive Garden.

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What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat whore.

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what did the white rapper say to the black rapper? i like your work. to which the which the black rapper replied, thanks.

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civil rights

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What's worse than getting an erection in church Getting an erection while naked in church

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your mom is so fat that she had to start going to a gym to exercise and get her weight under control.

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Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

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Whats dark, has an opening, and guys like to go into it? A Vagina

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whats the best thing about life? whatever the best thing about life happens to be!

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How many blonde chicks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to set the house on fire, and the other to call 119.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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