Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side

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How did 3 fat women fit under 1 small umbrella and not get wet? It wasn't raining!

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You want to hear a joke? Republican

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A man walked into a bar and a knife seventeen times.

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Who is the dumbest person on the entire internet? Shortpoet-GTD

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You know what happens when you assume right? Well, you make an educated guess based on prior knowledge to the circumstance at hand.

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Mum did you make my milkshake? No, I didn't son, but your father did. Fther's dead. I know.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "why the long face?" The horse says "I just found out I have AIDS"

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A Chinese man and an African man walk into a bar. Its good to see so much multiculturalism in a usually racist society.

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blonde: your cute Gangster: wanna go back to my crib blonde: you mean you can go back in time?

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why wouldn't the man's car work? because it was broken.

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charly ate an apple. the apple was filled with poison and charly died.

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Two peanuts are walking down the street. One of them was a salted Peanut

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Two Cows are knitting soda water in a lightbulb. One of them said: Talking about milk, what time is it? The other pulls out a thermometer, looked at it and said: Wednesday.

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A man walks into a bar and wakes up in the hospital with a mild concussion.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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a blind man walks into a wall

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Yo momma's so fat that she's gotta get a special door that will allow her to get through.

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What did the cow say to the dog? Moo

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Knock Knock Who's there? A kind hearted serial killer who will win your heart emotionally and then shoot you to death unexpectedly.

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whats the difference between harry potter and a jew? harry potter can escape the chamber

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Your mom is so stupid, she didn't know the answer to 2+5

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How do you confuse a blond? Nordic mytholigi. That is, if shes american

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Your mom is so ugly, Ew.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops