What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

Someone asked me "What rhymes with Orange?" I replied "Door hinge." He punched me.

Whats brown, sweet, and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Why did the elephant cross the road? Indiana Jones was riding on it to Pankot Palace

Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

How many like does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

How did the hot blonde get a promotion from her boss? She worked really hard and achieved more thaan her coworkers.

Why did the cat cross the street? It didn't. I cut off its arms and legs so it couldn't walk.

what did the history teacher say to his class? Get your books out.

Why didn't the boy go to the bathroom? His mother was taking a well deserved bath.

roses are red violets are blue count my five damn finger , and the third one is for you!!!!!!!!

A guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender asks why the long face. The guy responds because cancer is a horrible disease. Oh yah did I mention the guy has cancer? $

Want to hear what's totally out of this world? Not wasting a whole page of space for something that doesn't even vaguely resemble a joke. [L]

I don't drink. I'm not 21.

Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? Everywhere

How do you kill a jew? Same way you would anyone

How do you make an onion cry? Onions are incapable of crying

The last person on Earth is sitting home alone when suddenly there is a knock at the door. Knock knock Who's there? *silence* Damn this joke got creepy...

Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

i know the best knock knock joke! you start! other person: knock knock me: whos there ........

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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