roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers but at least i do not have Alzheimers

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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How do you take a picture of a man with a wooden leg? You can't take pictures with wooden legs.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, it won't come anyways.

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My friend just phoned me from the Boston marathon. He was being taken to the hospital due to being injured by the explosions and had to have his leg amputated.

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How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why did the little girlbnot wake up? Because her mother smothered her in her sleep.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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Roses are red,violets are blue,hit me once I will break you to Roses are red,violets are blue,I will kick your ass, as hard as to

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Q: What did the Mexican say to the other Mexican? A: To get to the other side.

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A woman is walking down the street. A midget approaches her and with his keen sense of smell, informs the tall woman of her delicious scent and says, "Ma'am your hair smells lovely, may I please take a closer sniff?" Then woman obliges and the midget is arrested for alleged rape, or as he put it, trying to sniff her vagina.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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Q; Whats the hardest part about nailing a dead baby to a wall? A; my dick while doing it.

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What do you call a Mexican policeman? Officer.

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What did the one stethoscope say to the other stethoscope? Nothing. Stethoscopes can't talk.

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Why does Joel get so many numbers from girls? Because he asks for them nicely.

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I put the STD in stud now all i need is U

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What did the man with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike

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Why Jimmy doesn't listen to his mother? Because he's deaf

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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What's the difference between epistemological pluralism.

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A Jew with a boner runs into a wall, what hits first? His nose

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why did little suzy fall off the swing? she was stabbed by a drugaddict

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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