A man starts acting weird in a resturant, the waiter says "whats the problem sir?" The man says "I'm choking and I just died."

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What's heavier: a kilogramme of steel or a kilogramme of feathers? A kilogramme of steel, because steel is heavier than feathers.

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What happens when you give a math problem to a blonde? She works through it to arrive at the answer.

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A Jew walks into a bar. It's a bar full of Neo-Nazis.

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How many squirrels does it take to change a lightbulb? 42.

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knock knock? who's there? ivan ivan who? ivan. i want you to apologize for tooking their jobs the other day i said ivan who? i dont have a middle or last name

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I like poop in my butt

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"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

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Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his forehead. Why did the little boy have a frog stapled to his forehead? Because Johnny just can't drive. Why can't Johnny drive? He has no arms and legs. Why does Johnny have no arms and legs? Cause Johnny is a potato! Why did Timmy drop his ice cream? Because he got ran over by a bus. But who was driving the bus? Johnny the potato!

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a bunch of guys did cocain for the first time. they later died from a drug over dose.

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what do you call a sick eagle illegal

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Doctor I have a headace! The doctor was dead.

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Q.What is black and white and red (read) all over? A. A penguin in a blender.

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Q: Santa Clause, the Tooth Fairy, and a rich mexican jump out of the plane at the same time. Who hit the ground first? A: The answer is none of the above, because they don't exist.

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This person shaved their head to gain attention. A klansman.

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knock knock come in ok!!!!! ur an elephant oh ya i guess im not suppose to talk!

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oh hi, i'm an idiot, i mean mitt romney

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What is faster? A mustang or a corvette? A fighter jet you stupid idiotic piece of crap!

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One day a woman wrote a letter to her husband whom was at war. He received it, read it, and was happy to know she was thinking of him.

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Why did the boy drop his vannlai ice cream?because Vannlia ice came.

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A black man walks into a store with a gun. It is a gun store and he needs to buy amunition after using all of his to fend of a home invader, and protect his family. He lives in a bad area because he never went to college and cannot get a well paying job in this economy, so he can't afford to buy a house in a better area He then used the gun to rob a bank. He no longer lives in a poor area

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You're so retarded that people make fun of you and you laugh with them because you don't understand and just want some friends.

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What is the difference between your mom and a vacuum? The vacuum does not use your mom to clean the floor since it is an inanimate object and can not control people.

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What's 2+2? Gonorrhea

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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