"Lassie, Lassie, come quick! Timmy is in the well!" "I'm a dog," replies Lassie. "You folks have ropes, ladders, and opposable thumbs. What the hell could I possibly do to help?" With that final act of disobedience, Lassie was turned into fertilizer.

Whats worse than the death of a celebrity? An anonymous person posting a joke on this site.

Your mum's so fat that she's incredibly lucky she has a loving and supportive husband who values her personality over her appearance.

Why did Quinn yell at his group project partner? Because he hated him.

What do you call a lesbian eskimo? The name she was given at birth.

What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

What do you call a man with a gun in his mouth? Keith.

Have you heard the one of the two headed man an the horse? Neither have I

roses are red violets are blue i have aids and so do you happy valentines day!

“DTF”? Says Will. “No” says Harper.

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing set? Because she didn't have any arms.

How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? He likes bungie jumping, and wanted to cheer himself up by doing one of his favorite hobbies

Why did suzy get in the car? She wanted to go somewhere.

where do some birds live in? Earth

What happens when you fire a machine gun clip into a jew? You are convicted on first degree murder, and most likely sentenced to jail because you can't afford a good lawyer. Orange jumpsuits are uncomfortable.

How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how you throw 'em.

How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends on how hard you throw them.

Why was Helen Keller depressed? She was deaf and blind.

What do you call a gay Chinese math teacher? A gay Chinese math teacher.

Q: What do you call 10 babies at the bottom of the ocean? A: Dead

A bra walks into a dyslexic man.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

one time, there was this anti-joke.com joke set-up. It was just like a normal joke set-up. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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