Why was the boy eating lunch by himself at school? Because his only friend was hit by a train.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

What did the apple say to the pear? ...Nothing they can't talk...

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have the Cadillac, Get the Guns

Why did the frog commit suicide? Because his mother was a typewriter

Why did the cops beat up rodney king? Resisting arrest.

What do a pizza man and a gynecologist have in common? They are both hardworking members of the community!

How does it change many dyslexics take to a lightbulb.

CJTheBEST Sticks and stones, May break my bones, Because i have osteoperosis

Q: what's your dog's name ? A: Dog.

Why did the man smell bad? He had not showered for several days

Why is Suzie at the bottom of the cliff? Because I pushed her. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

A chink walks into a bar. She is spotted by the secret police and instantly deported. Vote UKIP

What do you call a Black man with a gun ?? A black man with a gun !

You thought i'd be telling you a joke. Turns out im not.. !! haha

What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

What is worse than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Obama

Justin Bieber

Why did the chicken change the projector reel? To get to the other slide.

theres no 'I' in 'team' but theres an 'I' in 'hitler'

why did they plain crash? cause of gravity stupid

A man walked into a bar. He stayed for a bit and had a good time.

What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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