What did the shark say to the beached whale? Nothing.

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A man walks into a bar. He was the barman. [L]

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What has straight black lines and is square? A refferee.

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Knock Knock Who's there Kevin Kevin who Kevin your friend dumbass

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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There were three men walking across the road and it started to rain

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what did the cow say to shabab?....... want some milk

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a tomato.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother. Please open the door. Your mother who? You were adopted.

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tim tebow is a grat quarterback

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- why did the chicken cross the road? why? - to get to your house. - knock knock. who's there? - the chicken.

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"Knock knock." "Come in."

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar asks "Why the long face?". The horse replies " I am deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

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What's worse than having to watch your dad rape your mom? Having to watch your mom rape your dad.

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There were two friends, a girl and a boy. The girl had a ribbon tied to her neck, and every day the boy asked her why, yet she'd never tell him. They grew up together, and fell in love and still, she wouldn't tell him why she had the ribbon on her neck. They got married, and grew old, and still she wouldn't tell him. But one day, she said to him 'I'll show you why I keep this on my neck' and she took it off and her head fell off.

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Barman: Why the long face? Horse: To support my twelve molars and twelve premolars which help me chew grass so I can swallow it properly.

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What did the black person say when his white friend said "Nigga!"? "You know, I really don't get racist jokes like this."

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What did the slutty blonde get her boyfriend for Valentine's Day? Nothing because she had died of AIDS months ago.

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What's cold, tired, wet, and starving? A girl up at 4:00 am that just came out of a cold shower.

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What's worst than losing a million dollars? Losing a plane. Whats worst than losing a plane? losing 239 people, a plane and a million dollars

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What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops