knock knock who's there Bob I don't know you Bob and if you don't get off my porch this minute i'm calling the authorities.

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Whats circular and black? a black circle.

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Why did the blond check your phone? AIDS

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Why did the little boy fall down the steps? Because he wasn't a very stable person.

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You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

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Mom mom momie mom mom mom mom momie mother mother. What! Hi.

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer, the bartender quickly takes out a shot gun and shoots the horse because he is secretly dealing horse meat to tescos

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A black person goes up to the drive through at popeye's, what did they say? Nothing, it was closed.

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What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

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What did the cow say to the butcher? At least I'm not a Jew.

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? We are both farmers.

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Why was the boy holding his breath? A man was holding his head under water.

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A man wakes up in his bed and looks at the clock. He realises he is gonna be late for work. He quickly gets out of bed, into the bathroom, has a shower, puts his deodorant on and brushes his teeth, gets dressed, and goes in his car. He drives out of his garage and drives to his work but gets stuck in traffic. He then gets to the car park of his work and parks his car. He gets out, goes up the elevator to his floor, when the elevator door opens to his floor, he quickly says hello to Terrance and goes to his bosses office. And guess what the boss says? You're late.

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What do u call a man who sells hot dogs on the street? A Mexican

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Their were three business men going on a trip, they had only one bed in the hotel so they had to sleep in the same bed. The next day guy on the right said i a great handjob last night and the guy on the left said the same thing. The guy in the middle said last night i was dreaming i was skiing

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a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense?....

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Q: What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: The pizza does not scream in the oven.

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Sigh, visit me with a pack of condoms, that is so romantic... Now you tell me something, how old are you REALLY and what is your real name? Oh yeah, my first name is Tifa (I know you hate it for some reason), and I am turning 24 in 30 days.

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Whats worse than the Holacaust? Stepping on damn Lego's. MrBounty44

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm a dog.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy i have alzheimers hey i just met you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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