why did Susie fall of the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who`s there? not Susie

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What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

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-Knock knock -Use the doorbell -Oh... ding dong -Who is it? -Me -Oh -Yeah -Cool -Come in -Okay -Take off your shoes -Alright -How are you? -Good -That's good -Yeah -Okay -K -Oh -Bye -See ya

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Why did the old man cross the road? Coz he was in an ambulance

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Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. An orange.

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SUCK MY NUTS

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copy me and i will kill you

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black people

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"Why is Barney purple and green?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way"

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What is orange and smells like oranges? Oranges.

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What's worse than getting raped by a bear? Getting raped by two bears.

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What do you call a good anti-joke? something you feel like you should go to hell for laughing at.

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Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

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When birds fly south for the winter they fly in a V formation. one side is always longer than the other. why is that? Because there are more birds on that side

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Knock knock, who's there? Your mom! Oh I'm comming.

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Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

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why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

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what do grown up's do at night when everyone lese is asleep? Go to sleep as well

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a man walks into a bar. it was a metal bar. his balls hurt.

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Knock Knock there's a doorbell

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How did the chef bake 20 muffins for the king? My name is Bob.

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About numbers, it was 180 mg of valium... And I am going to live becausepeople got there in time, my heart never stopped because luck, the doc was only making a joke about me "having ingested enough valium to die at least twice". Sanders, I just got your girlfriend to agree to a threesome, if my banana ever wakes up again, AND WHEN... Thou areth forgiven, btw I sent him a picture of Line`s unshaved vagina, and a note stating: U recognize this? Find out more on horsehead network! Meh His name is Anders something Chattington, yeah for all that know him, guess whose finger is on her unshaven... Yeah, maybe you should not have messed with a guy that can have ANYONE. Ps: Then its your mother, then your sister which is 17 (and pretty 16 is legal here so fuck you Chatty!) and then I SHALL STRIKE THY WITH THE VENGEANCE OF A THOUSAND SUNS! Because you are forgiven, which I cant even remember what means, I mean I know I am typing my experiences here, but thats only because I remember by muscle memory where the buttons are, said the doctor... I can still play Snes emulators... Not, because my numb fingers cant click anything and Line is gone. I TOUCHED HER ALREADY YA KNO! YOU SAW THE PIC, My skin is tan, and... well you know she is here... The best part? She is totally okay with you knowing, sayonara pal, id watch the "fluor" in your mothers pussy the next time you eat it!

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there was once a jew

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: WHERE'S MY TRACTOR?!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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