Why did sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by an 18 wheeler Knock knock Whos there not sally

What do you say when you accidently punch a wasps nest? Nothing.The correct choice is ton run as fast as you can to avoid getting stung by the entire nest of wasps.

What is worse than catching someone trying to cheat by looking at your exam? Getting struck by lightning.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

why did the plane crash?.............the pilot was a tomato

Knock knock. Who's there? Super Monkey Ball Deluxe. Super Monkey Ball Deluxe who? Oh no.

What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? An ambulance.

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? Just in case he gets a hole in one! -LEts Go Mets P.S the comment below is also very stupid

"Knock, Knock." "Who's There?" "Banana."

Your so stupid that when during your baseball game your third base coach told you to run home, you did. The next day, you failed your test.

You know why no ones tried to kill Obama ? Picture him in an escalade!

What do a blonde and a good beer have in common? They both go down easy.

Dude, that's not banana ice cream...

Whats worse then a worm in your apple...... some of these jokes

Racial Equality

how many black people can you fit in a car? However many sets there are.

How did the black man manage to get that 42 inch TV? He had been working a lot of overtime at work to try and treat his wife and kids.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To mutilate the body of a Jewish girl that lay on the other side.

What is white, red, and all in your girlfriend? red and white blood cells

so a huge calculator walks into a bar, and a man steps out from behind it, and wipes his forehead.

What did the Asian say after he had a nightmare? Nothing his nightmare was actually reality and a dishwasher fell on him and killed him.

Where would you find a dog with one leg? Possibly in a vet's surgery, or in an animal rescue home or being cared for by a loving owner.

Why did the mexican immigrant have no friends? He lacked social skills and was unfamiliar with American mannerism's.

It works on whoever I have an emotional attachment with, for example people might be thinking you and I write in the exact same style, but I am actually copying your way of typing (spelling, word composition etc) this because we relate on a deep emotional level with people that like "get us" because they can act and behave like us. This again doubles the effect of the hypnosis, since when I get "super high on trance" and you feel that way, well, we both reach into the same wavelength, literally. Scientists and hypnotists supposedly have no idea as to why this happens, but I know, it is because our brain patterns are so similar, that even though we are at a long distance, your body believes itself to be an extension of mine and the other way around. How do I know this? Yogurt.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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