A gay man walks down a street before being stabbed to death by a homophobe.

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Hey, I'm Schrödinger, and this is crazy! But here's a sealed box... the cat lives, maybe...

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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So, a Vulcan walks into a bar... and he doesn't say anything, because Vulcan's suppress their emotions.

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Why couldn't the boy talk? He had his fathers hairy scrote was in his mouth

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Why did William commit suicide? Because his grandmother had recently died of terminal cancer. His mother left him on the front step when he was two, and moved to Tennessee with her baby daddy.

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What did the elephant say to the pelican? He didn't say anything. I lied.

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What's blue and looks like water? Yes.

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What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

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TIMMY

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Knock knock Who's there It's a policeman informing you that your parents have been killed in a car crash. Your Dad, who has been struggling with substance abuse and depression, found out his wife had been cheating on him, and in a drunken rage, wrapped the car around a tree.

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why can't hellen keller drive? Because she is visually impared and there for it would not be safe for her to drive

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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How do you get a baby to be quiet? Put it in the oven for a few minutes

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How can you tell if someone is a global warming alarmist? Their IQ on average is 10 points below normal

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how do u wake kesha up? Answer:set her alarm clock to a reasonable time

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Why was the black man running down the street with a suitcase? He was late for work.

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my friend died in a car crash, now i have no friends.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Two giant paint bubbles!

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Your so stupid that when during your baseball game your third base coach told you to run home, you did. The next day, you failed your test.

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HEY YOU! TISSUE!

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What is black and white and red all over? A dalmation that was hacked to death with a machete.

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Yo mama is so hairy! Then only language she speaks is Chinese

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Like if you have a vagina. Also like if you have a dong. (Penis)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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