What did the man do when he got home from work? Hit his wife.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. That's what she said

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A man agreed with a camel. The camel didn't agree. ... (This joke does only make sense in the Dutch language.)

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Why couldn't the teenager go to the pirate movie? He didn't have any money.

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Doctor! Doctor! Everyone seems to be stealing things! Piss off, I am a doctor not a detective you prick.

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what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

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what do you call a black man flying a plane? a pilot. what do you call a woman flying a plane? 9/11.

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I would piss if alex berry had aids n died

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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what did one gagged man say to the other gagged man? nothing he was gagged

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why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

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Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because the Nazis were on the brink of losing the war and Berlin was shortly to be captured by Soviet forces.

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There are two fish in a tank and one says to the other, "how do we drive this thing?"

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So a baby seal walks into a club...

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What do I have in common with your mum? We're in the same bed right now.

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Why is it easy to steal candy from a baby? Because the baby is smaller, weaker and would not pose any threat.

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knock knock whos there? jew jew who ? jew son o a b**** ? (aimed at ight wing racist jews)

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Why did the Mexican man grow a mustache? It wasn't his choice. Men naturally grow facial hair and he ran out of razors.

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how do you make a baby cry? you throw a brick at it's face!

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penis

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What's the best sound in the world? Children screaming

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what did Stan say to Dave? nothing, Dave died 500 years before Stan was born, thus he said nothing.

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because black people are usually stronger than chicken. If they weren't, chickens would probably eat fried black people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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