What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Love and attention from his parents.

Why was the man sad? His brother died.

How do you stop 5 black guys from raping one white girl? You call the police.

A horse walks into a bar. He called him Arthur. Those are two sentences.

Why did the pengoon cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

what do you call a tall black man with big ears? orangatang

If you just read this, You're dead.

What did the marshmallow say to the other marshmallow? We are both bananas.

hello

What word starts with "f" and ends with "uck"? Firetruck!

Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama all found a magical lamp. The Genie appeared and said, "I will grant one wish for all of you, and one wish only." Bill wished to become president. The other two thought that would be pretty cool and did the same. (ic3)

Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all broke beyond repair.

why was the boy crying? cause an elephant tusked him up the ass

25

Your mom is so nce that when you got into college she taught you to be more independent so you could succeed later in life.

why did the boy fall off his bike? because his mum through a fridge at him

How do you make a blonde go 'ewwwww'? Hand her a moose placenta.

Scumbag steve walks into his friend's dorm room, and finds out he has epilepsy. He then flicks the lights on and off really fast

In 1284, while the town of Hamelin was suffering from a rat infestation, a man dressed in pied clothing appeared, claiming to be a rat-catcher. He loyally promised the townsmen a solution for their problem with the rats. The townsmen in appreciation and glad to get rid of the infestation promised to pay him for the removal of the rats, they were looking forward to being left in peace. The man pleased with their decision accepted, and played a mystical musical pipe to lure the rats with a joyous song into the Weser River, where all but one drowned. Despite his renowned success, the people reneged on their promise and refused to pay the rat-catcher the full amount of money. The man left the town angry and upset the people had betrayed his kindness, he did however vow to return some time later, seeking revenge. On Saint John and Paul's day while the inhabitants were happily sat in church, he played his pipe yet again, dressed in green, like a hunter, this time attracting the young and joyful children of Hamelin. One hundred and thirty boys and girls followed him out of the town, skipping in song as they went, where they were lured into a cave. The events that followed are now known as the 1284 mass child massacrer, in which all 130 children were raped and savagely tortured and killed one by one, each viscously taped and recorded for the pipe pipers satisfaction, where a copy of each tape was sent to their corresponding parents, this was before their bodies turned up dangling from a tree and the bottom of the village, all 130 of them unrecognisable from decomposition and mutilation the pipe piper had inflicted.

A Muslim walked into a bar. He didn't drink anything

Why did the black man cross the road? he just wanted to cross the road, racist. ... after he had robbed a bank

Humpty the extreme sized grenade fell off the wall. The universe is now in little pathetic bits.

Whats worst than the holocaust? What? 6million Jews.

Knock knock Who's there? It's me It's me who? It's me who is knocking the door

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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